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October 2015 Wedding Blogs

Splitsville, USA

Splitsville, USA

It was a clear black night a clear white moon No this is not the beginning of Warren Gs 'Regulate' although I wish it was Do you remember your first love and how it all started Because I do It was the best relationship I had ever been in He was the biggest gentleman that I ever had the pleasure to be with He made me feel like the most important person in the world even if I was just standing in the same room as him- but sometimes you dont end up with your first love and you find...read more

Spotlight Proposal

Spotlight Proposal

How many of you agree that on your wedding day it should be all about you How many of you think the spotlight should be on you the bride or groom and no one else I used to believe so also That was until my best friends boyfriend Mark approached me with some real shit In the midst of planning my own wedding day he told me he was planning to ask Jessica to marry him Of course I was ecstatic and could not wait to hear what kind of proposal he had whipped up to surprise her with I...read more

Hogan Doesn't Know Best

Hogan Doesn't Know Best

I just want to look back at one of the tackiest wrestlings I mean weddings in celebrity history Just when you thought Hulk Hogan of VH 's Hogan Knows Best actually did know best little toe-head Brooke got engaged towrestler Bully Ray - despite her father's negative feelings towards him I wonder if Bully bullied her into it - Ha I crack myself up Anyway how did this dynamic-duo come to be Well Bully decided to put a ring on it in the ring and youll never guess where they held the oh-so-unstaged ceremony - you got it in the...read more

Swap Your Bartender For A Bud-tender

Swap Your Bartender For A Bud-tender

Are you the kind of person who sneaks contraband into a wedding You know the one who signals your buddies to take a little trip to the bathroom before the ceremony for some puff-puff-pass Thatd be me Yep right here raises hand Nowadays if were lucky us sly stoners dont have to sneak our favorite past-time LegalizeLA Weed bars or as I like to call them Cannabars are becoming a growing trend at weddings see what I did there So Im just going to encourage some of you soon-to-be-wed couples - if youre Mary Jane enthusiasts why not ditch the...read more

Stripper? Hardly Know Her!

Stripper? Hardly Know Her!

Dear Expert My fiance and I decided that we are not going to have the bachelor bachelorette parties before our wedding day I can tell she seems a little concerned about my guys hiring a stripper for me I want her to feel comfortable not stressed on out on our wedding day so we agreed to drop the traditional festivities altogether Its ultimately better for me anyway because I know how she is She'll spend the entire day so worried about what happened at the bachelor party that shell forget shes even getting married to me Even though we agreed...read more

Be A Blasted Bride Or Rethink Your Ink?

Be A Blasted Bride Or Rethink Your Ink?

Its safe to say that brides with tattoos have a few more things to consider before their wedding day - should they rep the ink or cover it up While there's no right or wrong answer the decision to show off their ink or hide it usually comes down to a few different factors tradition family photos presentation etc So we took it upon ourselves to speak with a few different tatted women some single and some already married about what they would do or what they have already done to see what it truly comes down to when deciding...read more

Here Comes The Botox

Here Comes The Botox

This is a PSA for anyone who is thinking about getting Botox before their wedding I promise you I am not going to go off on how you should be perfectly content with you natural beauty and how plastic surgery is a sin or whatever I come from a town where girls get nose jobs for their th birthdays OK- lets get real Im all for a little enhancement here a little nip and tuck there trust me I just want you to be smart about it So what I am going to say is that you can fine tune...read more

The Newlywed Game

The Newlywed Game

How well do you REALLY know your partner Whether he or she is your main man or lady your fiance or the two of you already tied the knot do you know your significant other like the palm of your hand Do you remember a lot from your relationships past experiences Do you know what color her toenails are right now Where did he take you on your first date This is the ultimate test in seeing how much you pay attention to your boo and how well you remember all of the times youve shared together You can and...read more

Baby Nazis

Baby Nazis

Oh the horror Oh the offense You wretched wretched couple - how dare you ban my children from your wedding said no one ever At least we would hope no one But hey there are those select few with children whose gears are grind-ed by the invitation to a non-child-friendly wedding Is it too much to ask for to desire a wedding thats vows arent accompanied by the wail of a beautiful little darling baby or whose flawless best man speech - that surely he paid good money for - isnt interjected by the restless LEGO building of forks knives...read more

Married And Screwed - Literally

Married And Screwed - Literally

Dear Expert My husband and I got married about two months ago and he is the love of my life Hes funny romantic respectful I can go on and on but in a nutshell hes my best friend How it happened we hit it off at a Burger King one evening after we both had finished working out After that we would casually meet up to get coffee or to eat lunch Then over a period of time we loosened up and became best friends our quaint innocent gatherings turned into some fun often sloppy outings From walking the mall...read more

Bride·zil·la, Noun

Bride·zil·la, Noun

I feel as if I need to have a conversation with you guys about Bridezillas Bridezillas are such a pandemic that Oxford has added this completely made up word to the dictionary Id like to pay a special thanks to all of you crazy bishes getting married for giving this word an actual definition Especially to my so-called friend Liz Liz is a horse of a different color Shes the type of human that comes from a pretty wealthy family goes to church every Sunday pops prescription pills tattoos bible verses on her wrists and chugs bottles of wine every...read more

Put A Ring On It! Just Not That One...Or That One

Put A Ring On It! Just Not That One...Or That One

The man of my dreams finally asked me to marry him It was a proposal that far surpassed my dreams which happened to be a lot tackier I grew up picturing a proposal center court of my favorite NBA teams basketball game I know I know not exactly the majority of little girls white horse and carriage proposal Im a tomboy I love everything and all things sports so this is what I envisioned - get over it It got a little more feminine as I grew older maybe Id be swept away off the court by a horse and...read more

Keep Your Girls Warm This Winter (Yes, I'm talking about boobs)

Keep Your Girls Warm This Winter (Yes, I'm talking about boobs)

As the temperature drops I see brides start to bundle up in scarfs sweaters and furs- not willing to give up their perfect strapless gown- and I dont blame them For many women you have had the idea of a perfect wedding dress since you were a little girl and just because the love of your life is from a farm in middle America doesnt mean you are now stuck wearing a parka at your winter wedding Now youre probably thinking What is she rambling on about I already knew that brides can wear long sleeve dresses carry muffs and...read more

From Open Bar To NOPE-en Bar

From Open Bar To NOPE-en Bar

Let me tell you about HELL Yeah I'm talking about a dry wedding reception For those of you that have not had the privilege of being tricked into thinking that you are sailing away to an oasis of free booze I experienced it for you Instead of reaching a never ending river of mojitos you will get there only to realize that your destination wasn't to said open bar and instead you were headed straight towards Satan's bedroom First things first - I promise you it is in your best interest to abandon ship Id seriously listen to Firework by...read more

Thanks For Coming, Here's Your Bill

Thanks For Coming, Here's Your Bill

Im sitting here holding a lovely manila envelope in one hand and a bill in the other thinking Are you fu king kidding me Excuse my french but I dipped into my savings AND made sacrifices just to be able to support the bride and groom on their wedding day and I am disgusted and offended that I received a bill in the mail for our dinner plates Is this not the tackiest thing ever Not only did my husband and I arrange for my mother to watch our children for the weekend - my mother who is years old...read more

Mancessories

Mancessories

Im sure if you have a computer - or have any connection to the outside world - you have seen a picture plaguing the internet of a groom and his groomsmen ripping their shirts open to reveal an array of wonderfully tacky superhero t-shirts I love this new trend as much as I hate it which has sent me into a confusing taffeta spiral until I came up with the perfect solution - Mancessories Mancessories are the perfect way for you yeah Im talking to you groom to get your individuality on while rocking a penguin suit Im talking about...read more

Dear Parental Units

Dear Parental Units

We understand you are very nervous and excited about our engagement and may be questioning what you can do to help Were here to tell you have one very simple job to display proper father of the bride or groom and mother of the bride or groom etiquette To the father of the bride aka FOB Your duties include but may not be limited to traditionally paying for the wedding at least part of it if not all of it walking your daughter down the aisle making a speech dancing with the bride and being a prime host Oh and...read more

When Celebs Do It Big

When Celebs Do It Big

When you think of hot married couples excuse me - hot married CELEBRITY couples who comes to mind Brangelina Kimye Jayonce Me too and yes I did use those cheeky couple nicknames - don't judge me These celebrities have the ability to create the wedding of their dreams and they definitely are not skimming in the creativity department Here are a couple of our favorite famous duos and their one-of-a-kind weddings Brangelinas Casual Chateau Wedding Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are CoupleGoals for sure Get this - before their official wedding at their french chateau the couple decided to marry...read more