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From Open Bar To NOPE-en Bar

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Let me tell you about HELL. Yeah, I'm talking about a dry wedding reception. For those of you that have not had the privilege of being tricked into thinking that you are sailing away to an oasis of free booze, I experienced it for you. Instead of reaching a never ending river of mojitos, you will get there only to realize that your destination wasn't to said open bar and instead you were headed straight towards Satan's bedroom! First things first - I promise you, it is in your best interest to abandon ship. I’d seriously listen to Firework by Katy Perry for hours on end in exchange for an open bar at a wedding.

I have a friend named Karin. Karin is the type of person where the saying "misery loves company" should be tattooed on the front of her forehead. Karin haphazardly got knocked up 3 months before her wedding. This selfish son of a biscuit decided at the last minute that instead of an open bar, she was going to have a dry wedding because she couldn't drink. So, if she can't drink apparently nobody else can?! (Bad form, Peter.) Look, I'm not the biggest fan of dry weddings, but I'll go. I just have to be prepared. By prepared, I'm mean I will be pre-gaming and possibly flasking it during your reception. Sorry, not sorry. You brought it upon yourself.

So, fast forward to my fun-sucker of a friend’s wedding. All of our friends came out, her wedding ceremony was beautiful, quick, and painless. The little baby bump was showing - it was all super adorable. We were all so happy for her, until we arrived at the reception. Before we were allowed into the doors, we were informed that her “open” bar has turned into a “NO-pen” bar. "But,no worries!" she said and shortly, she followed up with, "There is a face painter, clowns, and a ferris wheel outside". Hold the bouquet...did this just turn into a circus?  

I'm sorry, but there is only a certain amount of times you can go on a ferris wheel sober before you want to ride it to the top just to jump off - not to mention dealing with the 'Chester the Molester' clowns that they rented instead of getting me drunk. In an effort to save the night, a group of friends and I decided to make an open bar. Yes, we booze crashed the wedding like we were going to prom. One of us left and came back with 4 handles of vodka. (Not my choice, but I take what I'm given). Each of us would go to his car with a buddy, drink and come back sloshed. Suddenly, circus wedding became the best wedding ever.

At the end of it all, Karin wasn't the happiest of campers, but we were! The moral of this story is that if you don't have a booze bar at your wedding, your guest will make one for you whether it makes you happy or not. Happy Planning!

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