Under WHAT circumstances would you call off your wedding?
Let’s be realistic, life is complicated. Even more so when it comes to relationships. They are personal, scary, tricky and distinctly individual. But what happens to two people who fell in a love where everything seemed perfect - and then suddenly, it wasn’t?
Some Valid reasons to call off your wedding may be:
Strong Uncertainty, Gut Feelings or Intuition
You may have strong, uneasy, unsure feelings about something in your relationship; whether you are questioning the extent of commitment from your partner, you have been having very serious arguments, or you guys just can’t seem to come to a CLEAR mutual decision on having children.
If you are worrying more than you are excited for your wedding, it’s time to re-evaluate.
If you are having bad vibes or unresolved intuitive feelings, this can be a red flag… pay attention to your gut, it’s rarely wrong.
Never get married because friends, family or even social masses are putting the pressure on you. Pressure can come in all forms for all sorts of reasons; such as religious reasons, parental values, having children out of wedlock, or you see all of your friends getting engaged on Facebook and feel like you are supposed to be doing the same thing so you jump in.
If it's because of Facebook, you need to get off of Facebook.
Maybe your parents are “on their way out” and you feel a need to hurry up and get married so they can attend the dearest son or daughters wedding and be proud of you. Maybe the extremely romantic proposal won you over in the moment so much that there was no way you could spit the word “no” out, but now the romance wore off and you’re seeing things differently. Maybe you got pregnant, and don’t want to disappoint anyone by having a baby out of wedlock.
Whatever the reason, rushing shouldn’t be one.
Unresolved Important Issues
Don’t get married on unresolved issues...They will STILL BE THERE after the honeymoon, and what good is that going to do you? If you guys have issues that haven’t been taken care of and could seriously affect your relationship, they’re not going to disappear while you’re picking out your wedding dress or deciding on flower arrangements.
Are you SURE you want to marry someone you’re forcing yourself to believe WON’T ever repeat the error of infidelity, again? If he/she cheated once, they’ve already set a precedent, and most likely you will spend your days wondering or questioning every little move, no matter how hard you try to make yourself believe you trust that person again...it's unfortunate.
Differences - lots of them
Of course there will be differences, of course there will be times when it’s better to “agree to disagree”, but for the most part a successful marriage requires compromise and agreement on fundamental issues; important issues. Whether it is deciding where to build your home and raise a family or if you even want children, if you cannot agree on a compromise, beware of a future of clashes.
I know you may be scared of being judged, criticized, put down, or bashed for your decision; but I'll take a few mental beatings over a lifetime of unhappiness any day. Not to mention, if your friends or family are giving you shit for calling of your wedding, they don't even deserve your attention to their bashing. Marriage is a huge commitment, a life commitment, that you don't want to interupt with divorce... it's not a pizza you can order and just throw away if you decide you don't like it. There ARE severe consequences if you decide to pull out in the middle of the race; emotional, financial, all that.
Whatever your decision is, it's YOUR DECISION, no one else's, and you don't have to explain to anyone of your guests or invitees if you don't want to.